There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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