ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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