Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
My vagina is very pro this idea
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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