just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
tell me about the eggs
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize