question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
