this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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