Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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