Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
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