Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
