He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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