Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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