i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
