Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I have fence marks all over my body