I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
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Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
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So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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