I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
