Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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