After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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