So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
