Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
