WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
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I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
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He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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