Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
