$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
