I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
