OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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