We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
