Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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