Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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