Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize