Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
pray to the hookup gods
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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