is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
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She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
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and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.