That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
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