would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
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