every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize
