Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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