At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
do herpes really smell.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize