I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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