Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
people are starting to question the shark bite story
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Come on in and take your pants off
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