ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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