chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
