Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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