this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Randomize
