her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
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