we're chasing vodka with high fives
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Ladies don't puke and tell
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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