Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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