it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
