we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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