I can text with my tongue
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
