glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize