there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
