I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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