The maid of honor just puked.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
